Refereeing Reality

Election fever eh? Seems we’ve all got it judging by the news coverage at the moment (although I checked my election this morning and it seemed fine). As promised last week here’s what I would do if elected Emperor of Respect. I’ve studied the approach of the three main parties and decided to go with the most suitable, for which you should read read ”easiest”, campaign style.

I have discounted the pregnant wife idea as utilised by the Conservatives. I admire the publicity they’ve generated with SamCam although I wrongly assumed this was a website I could use to view the conception. Feeling disappointed, and slighty grubby, by this anti-climax, I turned to the Lib Dem’s for guidance. Could they loan me Vince Cable I asked? Not outside the transfer window apparently. So I have instead shamelessly stolen the Labour pledge idea. Maybe you won’t agree with all my suggestions but feel free to comment below. That’s one of the key tenants of democracy. Just remember to leave your contact details so I can have you exiled (along with Chris Kamara) when the revolution comes.

It’s not the managers, players or even the F.A. that drive the game in this country. Like many other aspects of our life our perceptions are guided by the media. But the footballing authorities can make the broadcasters play along. This is why my plan doesn’t require, or even recommend, an improvement in refereeing although it should result in improved player behaviour which would make the man in the middle’s job a lot easier.

1. Education

There aren’t that many rule changes most years. Some subtle amendments perhaps and would they be so hard to keep up with? I’ve heard references to the “daylight” rule during matches this year. What hope have referee’s got when commentators peddle such outdated guidance? If you discount the money making pre-season tournaments, and really they should, what else do football journalists have to do during the summer break? It’s their version of the school holidays so should they not be given some rulebook related homework instead of spending the whole six weeks playing Call of Duty round Clive Tyldesley’s mum’s house.

2. Training

So now our intrepid pundits know the laws of the game. But it’s not that simple. These rules need to be implemented. Having come up through the professional game it’s unlikely that they’ve ever had to run the line just because they were the only substitute and no spectators volunteered. Take them out of their comfort zone and get them to spend some time officiating Sunday league football. Once you’ve had a 15 stone psychopathic centre-back (preferably still drunk from the night before) tell you what he’ll do if you don’t raise your flag for offside NOW is to truly know the nature of the beast.

3. Learning and earning

Up to now my suggestions have been no carrot and all stick. You might say “no Scholes and all Crouch”. But there is an incentive for the TV companies to buy in to our brave new world. An apprentice style reality show based upon our second pledge and using the tried-and-tested Apprentice model. A sure-fire ratings winner. Howard Webb to play the Alan Sugar role. “You’re OFF!” he could bark weekly at one unlucky pundit whose only crime will have been not to book a player for removing his shirt. Let’s call it “Who’s the winner in the black”. The whole time we’d be laughing at Paul Merson trying to keep up with play whilst learning that the whole of the ball needs to cross the line before it’s a throw-in.

4. Censorship

Controversial title eh? Well, let’s call it positive affirmation instead then. Hopefully by now our journalists will have a greater appreciation of the officiating roles. Maybe this will result in them being a little more understanding that the Assistant Referee does not have the benefit of 3 different slow motion replays before deciding if Craig Bellamy was offfside. If I was the F.A. I’d also be pushing TV and newspapers to grill managers on tactical questions rather than give them the easy option out.

Repeatedly asking whether the penalty/sending off/offside was the “turning point” is lazy, ineffectual journalism. Asking a manager whether they practice shirt-pulling during corner kick training is not disrespectful; it is offering a genuine insight into the professional game. A malicious foul, a sly elbow or a raking of the Achilles; all are performed in the knowledge that a match official might spot them. Yet they still happen and they are still unacceptable acts even if they escape punishment

Players (and coaches) need to take responsibility for their actions and if highlighting their errant ways costs them sponsorship deals then so be it.

5. Accreditation

The reward for complying with our plan would be to gain official F.A. Respect accreditation for that channel or newspaper. All major media companies would have to be suitably accredited before being invited to bid for broadcasting rights. Written journalism would be similarly reviewed allowing an official F.A. Respect Partner logo to be displayed; in effect a Kitemark of quality. Only official partners would be invited to the marquee events such as kit launches. No respectable media outlet would want to be left out in the cold so you’d expect take-up to be high.

The best match officials have always stood out from the herd because of the respect they have from players and coaching teams. Some of this will come from their decision making skills but no referee makes it to the top flight without having a good grasp of the fundamentals. Pierluigi Collina was much feted (and rightly so) but he was, like all of us, fallible – ask Everton fans about their match against Villareal in 2005. What marked him out was the authority he projected and the confidence that, whatever decision he made, he did so because he believed he was right.

If we can help project a more respectful portrayal of our officials in the media then perhaps they will feel more empowered. Confidence in them will rise creating a virtuous (centre) circle. You’ll note that election pledges aren’t the only New Labour trick I’ve picked up but if a little media spinning is for the greater good who are we to disagree?

Effing and jeffing at the reffing

R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Find out what it means to me. Well, in the face of a supposedly high profile FA initiative, it seems it matters very little to players, coaches or the media. Despite frequent calls to her agent I’m afraid I have no indication of Aretha Franklin’s current viewpoint. But I do know that it should be obvious to most that the “Respect” campaign has had no effect on football referees at any level.

Let’s start at the top. Managers. Why not do a little experiment? Run through the match reports on the BBC website or indeed any other major online sporting website. Count the number of post match interviews where the manager bemoans a match changing decision, nay “catastrophic error”, by an official. Now cross reference it against their side’s result. Spot a correlation? Well done, award yourself a gold star, or maybe three points.

Perhaps player behaviour has improved then. Let's have a look at the official site of the Premier League. Surely the campaign has resulted in improved discipline on the pitch. So far this season 55 different players have received their marching orders and 339 have been booked. In the whole of last season the figures were 56 and 351 respectively*. It seems clear this will be exceeded by 9th May. And for once we don’t have any major rule changes to blame. Everything has already been addressed (in theory); professional fouls, tackles from behind, waving imaginary yellow cards – all been clamped down on in seasons past.

Off the pitch we’ve had no reduction in abusive chanting. Not really the peace and love vibe that the FA hoped for is it? And at grass roots level I can offer only anecdotal evidence but I’ve noticed no less shouting at match officials during my coaching work this year.

Despite this I remain optimistic that the campaign can result in, as Aretha’s countryman would say, “Change we can believe in”. The FA should aim their guns towards a vocal minority who have the biggest influence on the football loving public. Commentators, journalists and pundits. How? In my next blog I’ll be running through my 5 point plan for a brighter future. R.E.S.P.E.C.T.? It’s not over until the fat lady sings.

* http://www.premierleague.com/page/Statistics/0,,12306,00.html

Punditry v Pun-ditry

The intention of this blog is to consider some of the less clichéd footballing stories. So imagine my disappointment, and possibly yours too, on finding that I can't avoid this initial blog making mention of the latest Beckham incident. "Incident" fits perfectly as it's the generic term for any incoming story that the news channels deems necessary to have scrolling across the bottom of your TV screen, preferably in the lurid black and yellow colours favoured by bees and wasps to highlight imminent danger. It’s not necessary to be a sporting icon to end up on Sky Sports News breaking news tickertape. They'll happily put up an urgent message if Rochdale's third choice keeper runs out of shortbread. So in a world cup year when England's right sided contenders are falling like skittles I can see why Sky Sports might want to have to schedule their reporting around Beckham's Achilles.

Send in the A Team! Get “roving reporter” Gary Cotterill on a flight (I'd like to think this involves a Mr T style tantrum - I ain't getting on no plane foooool! - requiring Georgie Thompson to slip something into his drink) and dispatch him to the trouble spot; AKA a Finnish hospital. Even Kay Burley of "real" news fame was whisked off to stand in front of an obligatory indistinct building, Beckham's surgeon's house perhaps or maybe even the local ankle sock manufacturers, whilst solemnly proclaiming that all the eyes of the world were focused on this location, a veritable footballing ground-zero.

I expect that by now your are wearily expecting a comfortable ride through the usual wannabe-journo topics regarding Beckham's influence on England and the associated media circus (we've lost our best potential option for right back since you asked and yes, I do believe his absence might lessen the pressure on Capello's team come June). But my concerns for England are more Wright-sided than right-sided. Who will be the commercial broadcaster's choice of pundits when we finally get to the World Cup? Will LA Galaxy let David risk his glittering MLS career by allowing him to sit on the sofa alongside ITV's finest? If so, would David take umbrage at Wrighty's^TM unwavering belief that SWP is the finest wide player England have ever had? Most importantly of all, will he be any good as a pundit?

I can guarantee that preliminary talks will have started the moment he hobbled into the San Siro changing rooms as the various networks battle to secure some of that Brand Beckham. Up till now the Beckham image has always been tightly controlled by the close knit management team round him (for an informative insight I can highly recommend Grant Wahl's book "The Beckham Experiment"). If his role is to be that of moronic cheerleader where would this leave Ian Wright? Would Beckham leap up and down during the game providing ITV with their vital half time filler footage? Or is it possible that he might surprise us all and show a tactical acumen that didn't always manifest itself in an England shirt? ITV should be worried that he might start off on the right hand side of the sofa, drifting inside to get involved with queries aimed at Andy Townsend and finally distributing hollywood style questions from Jim Rosenthal’s lap.

You may wonder why I have not mentioned the Beeb so far. There is one reason why Beckham won't be signed up by the BBC this year. It's not just that they already have a steady line-up of pundits. In the past they have not been adverse to having a token cheerleader either; Ian Wright’s first foray into punditry was at the BBC before complaining, without a hint of irony, that he was being used solely as a “comedy jester”. Which would have been true had he actually been in the least bit funny. In fact the BBC might be the only broadcaster with the money needed to tempt Beckham. So what's stopping them from completing a real life Panini dream team sticker book album of Shearer, Lineker, Beckham? Well, with the tabloids after them we can already expect a headline or two thundering about the amount money spent (I predict "More BBC staff in South Africa than players"). They surely won't risk providing the world's richest player with accommodation and expenses for a month?

So far the Beckham-as-pundit debate seems to be more posing more questions than answers. I guess that is also the worry for any prospective interviewer.